the grinch and a doppelganger

Babies are everywhere. It is a season I suppose, a time when I am surrounded by friends with new little ones. Some are becoming parents for the first time and are gripped with fear and joy and are covered in spit up. Some are veterans, ushering new bodies into their families with ease. While we are content with three and not anticipating having a new baby in the family for the time being, it got me thinking about  my own inauguration into motherhood. The baby boy who made me a mommy is about to turn 10 this month.  10 years of motherhood and I am a doppelganger of myself. I look the same- just with a little more sun damage than I did 10 years ago but my soul is different. Having a child changes us.

Do you remember in the movie How the Grinch Stole Christmas when the Grinch is alone on the mountain after plundering the Christmas of the Who's down below, and his heart swells to three times its normal size? It reminds me of Motherhood because that is what happens when you become a parent. You feel more deeply. You become capable of a raw, scary fullness of emotion that tenderizes any hard areas of your heart. It endangers you to vulnerability and you feel for other peoples suffering more than you used to.

It is if somehow this person who came from our wombs is a embodied symbol of the ways we open ourselves to  the world around us.

So blessings to my friends who are becoming more themselves by welcoming new life into their homes. May you find the swelling of your heart and the salty tears of joy to be the greatest gift of the day.